"I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you in with loving-kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt...and go out to dance with the joyful." - Jeremiah 31: 3-4

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

God is good. God is great.

I will never claim to understand God. His ways are so above my own that I can't even begin to comprehend how He plans the paths of my life. But thankfully, I don't have to understand Him. I just have to trust Him. That, I can do. I'd be a fool not to trust God after all that He has shown me He is capable of doing. And now it's time to add one more miracle to that list.

God is bringing me back to Kenya. Again.

I came home at the beginning of this month, excited and ready to start fulfilling my goals of leading a new life in Christ. It took me about two weeks to realize that something was wrong. Nothing was connecting with me. I wasn't feeling led to pursue anything and I was getting frustrated with God. I wanted to start a new life so why weren't any doors opening? I was not at peace and I knew there was something that needed to happen. I just had no idea what it could be or where to even start looking. I begged God to show me and lead me onto the path that He wanted me on. At this point, I would have walked across the country in a prom dress if that's what I felt God wanted me to do. I was desperate for guidance.

That's when I went out to breakfast with Faith Ecenroad. Faith took me on my first trip to Kenya back in July. She was supposed to come to Kenya in November but wasn't able to because of health issues. We had been looking forward to spending some more time together in Kenya and when it didn't work out, we were both pretty bummed. And then she asked me the question that answered all my prayers. "Would you want to come back to Kenya with me?"

I can't explain the feeling that washed over me at the moment. Something like relief mixed with pure joy and a dash of shock. I couldn't believe that I was going back to Africa! Because I was. There wasn't a doubt in my head that this would work out. That's how strong the peace was that came over me. I brought it up to my parents later that day. Though I didn't expect them to say no, I wasn't expecting such a huge yes either. They were thrilled and gave me their blessing.

So on January 27th, I'll be on a plane to Nairobi. This time, my main priority is to be discipled and mentored by Faith. Along with that, I'll be spending most of my time working with the Shimo girls and the Neema girls.

This will be my third trip to Kenya. Each time I'm there it seems as though God has a different plan. In July, I made a full commitment to Jesus and for the first time in years began walking with Him again. The second time, I was healed and restored through my forgiveness of the ones who had hurt me. I was introduced to the church as the body of Christ, not a building and I was shown what my life as a true, Spirit filled believer would look like. This time, I believe that God will begin to direct my steps towards what my mission is in the church. How I can use the abilities that God gave me to benefit the body. With Faith as my mentor I'll be learning not only how to give presentations about Transformed International and spreading awareness, but also how to live my life with confidence in Jesus Christ and in His plans for me.

I have no doubt that this trip will complete the plans that God has for me in Kenya and I can't wait to see what He is going to do in the six weeks that I'm there.

So again, I don't understand God. I probably never will but truthfully, I don't think we're supposed to. He's God! As soon as you understand something, it becomes less amazing, less beautiful, less incredible. We will constantly be driven to know God more because we will never know everything about Him! We will never fully understand God, but He's the God of LOVE, not the God of knowledge. I love my Jesus and that's all I need to know!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! :)

"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him." 1 John 4:16

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